September 15, 2019
  • 9:12 am The 6 Questions That Led Me to Christianity
  • 9:12 am Christianity and Humanism – Stefan Gustavsson (Part 2)
  • 9:12 am Jagmeet Singh on the campaign trail | Day 2
  • 9:12 am Amrit Vela
  • 9:12 am The Differences Between The Major Branches Of Islam
I Lost My Brother


My brother wasn’t the nicest person but we loved each other. And. over time he developed severe depression. One day I was on a class trip and I was having
fun. So we had just finished up for the day and
we were at dinner and the teacher got a phone call and her eyes just got a look of terror. She just pulled me aside and told me that
“your brother has been found in the bathroom with his wrists slit.” My eyes just filled with tears. I went home from the trip early and I didn’t
get to see him. They said I shouldn’t have to see him like
that. I went to his funeral and everyone there was
crying. We opened his casket so that everyone can
see him one last time and say goodbye and I couldn’t go over there. I kind of just had a mental breakdown right
then and there at his funeral. I just had to leave and go home. I couldn’t take it. I didn’t get to see him being buried. I would just lay in my room not come out and
my mom would bring you food and be like “try to eat this honey.” And I would tell her “uh-huh” but I never
really ate it. I lost a total of 30 pounds during that time. Eventually, I started to come out more and
kind of got to the fact that he was gone. We boarded up his room and we never went in
there. I didn’t go to school for about three months,
and when I finally did, everyone would just stare at me look at me and just say, “she’s
really here?” And “Like I can’t believe she actually
came here.” I started coming to a therapist cuz my doctor
recommended that. My mom just did everything she could to help
me and my sister get through it. One day I saw my mom talking to a guy and
he said, “okay so we’re gonna put the wall right here.” And turns out they were gonna board up my
brother’s room permanently by putting another addition to the room. To me, I didn’t want that to happen so I told
my mom “NO!” But she told me they were gonna do it anyway. But before they put up the wall I went in
there and I took everything out of the room that I wanted to remember him by. The main thing that I wanted to take was one
of his best hockey trophies. My brother loved hockey and he had a great
trophy that he got to take home after they won the championship. I saw the trophy and it sits in my room staring
at me just taunting me. A lot of times I walk to the cemetery where
he’s buried and I just sit there and talk to him I guess. I still miss him. Every day I just think “what could I have
done?”

Jean Kelley

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100 COMMENTS

  1. TCC Adventures Posted on July 5, 2019 at 9:40 pm

    I couldn’t imagine my brother dying and this video made bust out crying. I feel so bad for her.

    Reply
  2. Megan and Holly Gaming Posted on July 5, 2019 at 10:03 pm

    I feel like u it’s very hard to lose someone I lost my uncle

    Reply
  3. itz_ rose Posted on July 6, 2019 at 7:20 am

    I would never want to lose my brother even if he's mean to me I'll still love him and also my brother has autism he's 7 years old.. I love him sm

    Reply
  4. Heavenly love Posted on July 7, 2019 at 2:47 pm

    I'm so sorry for your loss i know he's watching over u right now

    Reply
  5. Gada star Posted on July 7, 2019 at 11:55 pm

    U have been on the same page as me

    Reply
  6. rezan omer Posted on July 9, 2019 at 11:10 am

    This story make me cry.😢 but everyone be die.

    Reply
  7. Ariel Protack Posted on July 9, 2019 at 9:05 pm

    Im so sorry❤ your brother is in a better place

    Reply
  8. Joshua Delmaestro Posted on July 9, 2019 at 9:47 pm

    I miss my sister Eva she died 9 years ago

    Reply
  9. Caitlyn Bellamy Posted on July 10, 2019 at 12:08 am

    I lost me sister she was a baby I never got to see her she dead from the sun and got never to go to her grave yeared

    Reply
  10. Stewart Crane Crane Posted on July 10, 2019 at 2:48 am

    i’m sorry for your loss

    Reply
  11. Kittygirlawesome Posted on July 10, 2019 at 6:01 am

    Poor girl

    Reply
  12. Kittygirlawesome Posted on July 10, 2019 at 6:02 am

    NOOOO

    Reply
  13. Kittygirlawesome Posted on July 10, 2019 at 6:02 am

    THIS REMINDS OF MY BABY COUSIN HE DIED

    Reply
  14. Bobby Turner Posted on July 10, 2019 at 5:19 pm

    THAT IS SO SAD 😥

    Reply
  15. Luna gabriela Posted on July 10, 2019 at 9:19 pm

    this is so sad

    Reply
  16. Sammi Ullom Posted on July 11, 2019 at 6:05 pm

    I’m sorry that you lost your brother you’re a great person God is by your side no matter what your brother is in a better place now and I hope Ian‘s happy and bear in heaven you will always have a place in your heart for him and I’m just really happy that he’s in a better place because heaven is really good and I I lost a lot of my pets like four of them that’s a lot a lot for me and it was really heartbreaking and I even gave depression when my cat broke well died kilo she was a really great and fluffy cat well not as fluffy as a onyx I mean spook you will always have a whole hole in your heart for him like I have holes in my heart for my pets that will die and die and died you are in a crash coolest person in the video I like how you like have purple streaks in your hair it’s really cute

    Reply
  17. Teo Ribin vlog Posted on July 12, 2019 at 8:52 am

    That girl is from episode: "my scary little sister"

    Reply
  18. ZOMBIE-BIG-D Posted on July 12, 2019 at 12:19 pm

    This made me cry because this reminded me of my brother who died when he was four he was always a little annoying but I actually never got to know where you put it was always mean to him and I never got him I love you to him I feel so bad for you I just want you to know that it was the only one in this you’re not alone I feel so bad for you I know how this feels and I want you never to forget him

    Reply
  19. ZOMBIE-BIG-D Posted on July 12, 2019 at 12:20 pm

    Don’t worry he’ll always be in your heart

    Reply
  20. putit guy 2 Posted on July 13, 2019 at 5:42 pm

    Suicide is not the right thing

    Reply
  21. Ketio Unknown Posted on July 14, 2019 at 4:30 am

    How to make this it does not even animate yet

    Reply
  22. Wolf_ Gamer199 Posted on July 14, 2019 at 11:39 pm

    Don’t worry if you love him…he’s even in you heart

    But god lives in your heart

    Reply
  23. Stephanie Tinoco Posted on July 15, 2019 at 2:17 am

    POOR girl

    Reply
  24. goober Posted on July 15, 2019 at 6:31 am

    If you're going to kill yourself, dont becuase some one is going to miss you. And some one is going to be mad at you. I'll be a little bit mad at you, and I dont even know you. Talk to someone.

    Reply
  25. Campbell Quattlebaum Posted on July 16, 2019 at 3:35 pm

    Same. But I never got to meet him anyways

    Reply
  26. Santiago De Jesus Posted on July 16, 2019 at 9:10 pm

    =(,,,,,,

    Reply
  27. Hayden John Posted on July 17, 2019 at 1:19 am

    I am so sorry 😭😭

    Reply
  28. Oreos Chubby crums Posted on July 17, 2019 at 11:38 pm

    It’s ok my brother died.. AND MY SIS my sister crying 😭 year pass away I was crying a lot case I miss them my sisters tired to cheer me up but nothing.. when I stop crying but he’s in and she in happen like if u lost a brother or a sister

    Reply
  29. CISKOKIDD DOMINGUEZ Posted on July 18, 2019 at 3:48 am

    I don't want to talk to my sister that was a hard time I had a mental breakdown and I didn't know what was going on so I was kind of in the same place as you

    Reply
  30. XXshadow chan Posted on July 18, 2019 at 3:32 pm

    She has the same name as me! Though…it's sad to hear her bro died … But I'm sure he's happy in heaven ❤️❣️❣️❣️❣️😇❣️❤️😇😇😇❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️

    Reply
  31. Janny Lopez Posted on July 18, 2019 at 10:29 pm

    I lost my 🚼 sister

    Reply
  32. Jocelyn Beatricia Posted on July 19, 2019 at 10:45 am

    Is so sad

    Reply
  33. Jam Kin Posted on July 20, 2019 at 11:46 am

    How did he die? 🤔🤔🤔😭😭

    Reply
  34. AnthonyLanza Posted on July 20, 2019 at 2:39 pm

    Sorry for your loss my dad died in February 2017

    Reply
  35. ITZYasin Posted on July 20, 2019 at 5:00 pm

    Am i the only one whos crying?😭🤧

    Reply
  36. Take a chance To dance Posted on July 20, 2019 at 9:33 pm

    don’t think of what you could’ve done because you did nothing wrong. You couldn’t have done much due to it being depression you’ll see him one day

    Reply
  37. みすMisu Posted on July 21, 2019 at 5:31 am

    Bro… you didn’t go to school for three months?

    I lost my mother and I was forced to go back to school 3 days after her death. Plus, they shoved me with exams and homework when it was in November, the start, not the end.

    Reply
  38. Podaj747 Posted on July 21, 2019 at 6:56 am

    Oh. Poor ya. I lost my grandfather from my dad's part when I was like, 6.5 yrs old. All I remember doing with him is being on his funeral.

    Reply
  39. douchebag69 Posted on July 22, 2019 at 2:51 pm

    Subscribe to t-series

    Reply
  40. Shannon Miller Posted on July 22, 2019 at 9:15 pm

    I’m so sorry for your loss of your big brother

    Reply
  41. A T Posted on July 23, 2019 at 12:48 am

    I feel the same way as you I lost my grandma and today my brother and my sister lost their grandma

    Reply
  42. Kayla D Posted on July 23, 2019 at 3:43 pm

    💙🕊⭐️.

    Reply
  43. William MacCurdy Posted on July 23, 2019 at 10:42 pm

    People who commit suicide when they know that other people still love them are super selfish imo.
    How could you do that to your friends and family!? Smh…

    Reply
  44. Freezing Blade Posted on July 24, 2019 at 1:10 am

    Why does this have dislikes?😡

    Reply
  45. Marilu Rodriguez Posted on July 24, 2019 at 11:46 pm

    He love you so much

    Reply
  46. leslie silva Posted on July 26, 2019 at 4:06 am

    I feel bad for ur brother! 😭😯
    R.I.P

    Reply
  47. Angel delissa Posted on July 26, 2019 at 4:57 am

    I tried to kill myself so many times I lost count and I failed every time

    Reply
  48. Ashton Harris Posted on July 26, 2019 at 5:49 am

    What does it mean his wrist weat

    Reply
  49. Alex Posted on July 26, 2019 at 8:25 am

    Thank you so much for sharing this story. My older brother passed away last night from a suspected overdose, and it doesn't feel real. I just want to wake up and realise that it's a nightmare but I can't and I don't know how to live without him. We were supposed to survive together, he had so much to live for. He'd turned 18 in February and graduated high school and got into uni to study paramedicine. He just got his P lisence and a job and his life was just about to begin. Mental illness runs in our family but we had both been clean for months and it was always us against the whole world. Now he's gone and I don't want to live without him, I can't.

    Reply
  50. Melvin Galeas Posted on July 28, 2019 at 8:08 am

    That is so sad😭😭😭😭😭😭🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔

    Reply
  51. Marcos p Perales Posted on July 28, 2019 at 6:52 pm

    1 like = 2 prayers

    Reply
  52. Anime Geek Posted on July 29, 2019 at 1:14 am

    Who else wanted to hug eylse?

    👇

    Reply
  53. Dezmond Hurd Posted on July 29, 2019 at 3:17 am

    1 like 1000 hugs for Eylse 🙁

    Reply
  54. Khadeeja Ali Posted on July 29, 2019 at 10:21 am

    Anyone getting bratayley vibes???😢😢😢

    Reply
  55. Unicorn Squad Posted on July 30, 2019 at 1:58 am

    My grandpa and uncle did and I never met I miss them even if they don't know me and if don't know them

    Reply
  56. ReenaBunny Gacha Posted on July 30, 2019 at 4:51 am

    I lost my other brother 8 years ago,and so sad..he died two months after he was born😭😭😭😢😢😢

    Reply
  57. Maribel Moreno Posted on July 30, 2019 at 4:26 pm

    it's OK 😊

    Reply
  58. tgbennett30 Posted on July 30, 2019 at 7:17 pm

    How dare that trophie

    Reply
  59. Jorge Castillo Posted on July 31, 2019 at 8:14 am

    He is still with you you just cant see him hes in heaven 🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇🕇

    Reply
  60. Jorge Castillo Posted on July 31, 2019 at 8:20 am

    its ok i lost my dad his last goodbyes where caleb im gunna miss you 😭

    Reply
  61. Jana Ahmad Posted on July 31, 2019 at 7:25 pm

    Omg I am so so so sorry for you… I feel the same like you some people I loved died …. just stay strong he will always be in your heart and I hope you will meet in heaven

    Reply
  62. Anna Schumin Posted on July 31, 2019 at 10:37 pm

    Wait. How did he die?

    Reply
  63. Dan Posted on August 1, 2019 at 4:54 am

    I thought you meant you lost him in the woods or something

    Reply
  64. Smokey Posted on August 1, 2019 at 12:50 pm

    Well this was depressing

    Reply
  65. nate ogz Posted on August 2, 2019 at 8:24 am

    If my brother died I will be sad to 😞😞😞😞😞😢

    Reply
  66. xaquitaine Posted on August 2, 2019 at 4:48 pm

    Suicide only passes it to someone else.

    Reply
  67. twístéd tréé øf løvé Posted on August 2, 2019 at 8:48 pm

    Onesie! ☝

    Reply
  68. cancan supsup Posted on August 2, 2019 at 10:45 pm

    Thats so sad

    Reply
  69. Kukui Black Posted on August 3, 2019 at 6:29 am

    I just wish my brother would love me, but since my cat died he's been talking trash behind my back and slaps and cuts me with a knife if I don't do what he says and I just wish that he would stop and the fact that these two kids at school bully me, kick me, punch me, slap me, and call me a demon and monster doesn't help at all and I know a lot of kids have it worse but I just wish they would stop and I can't go to my parents because they'll just tell me I'm lying. I just wish someone would actually be kind to me for once and hug me and just tell me that everything is going to be alright. And yes I have thought about suicide a couple times but I know that the lord won't want me to so I'm trying to forget about it, but it's really hard. I hope one day my life will be better😿 but knowing how things usually work on here everyone's probably going to make fun of me for finally saying this out loud and won't even read it, but I understand, I'm a monster and a loser, so why would you want to read my comment. 😿😔

    Reply
  70. Michael Hall Posted on August 4, 2019 at 12:23 am

    My brother attempted suicide. I'm glad he failed

    Reply
  71. Cheryl McKeeth Posted on August 5, 2019 at 4:37 am

    I feel terrible for your brother.😧😢😭💔💖

    Reply
  72. damian Posted on August 5, 2019 at 6:13 pm

    I kind of relate to u

    I had a gf her name was Evie she was an amazing person one day before my birthday I was at my grandma's house and when i got home my mum said evie had been and put a present on my bed and left I went and there was a bracket that had I ❤️ u on it and a note saying she loved me and goodbye I got so scared I ran to her house as fast as I could knocked on the door and asked if Evie was there her dad said she was upstairs in her room I went to her room but it was empty I thought she was just in the bathroom so I sat in her room and waited for about an hour so I knocked on the door a few times but nobody replied I sent her a text and her phone went off in her bedroom she never left the house without her phone I began looking around her room that might help me find her and I came across antidepressants
    She never told me she had depression I tried to open the bathroom door but it was locked I got really scared I shouted for her dad he listened to the door to see if he could hear anything he heard something dripping he called her name a few times but nobody replied he began kicking the door until it came off the hinges on the floor was her body in a pool of blood with large deep cuts in her wrists surrounded by smaller cuts I was heartbroken she was the only person I loved and the only person that kept me alive ever since we were kids me her and our close friend Bella
    Bella was older than us by 2 years about a month after Evie's death Bella was in the Manchester suicide bombing and she didn't survive I have nothing now they were everything to me and I miss them so so much of give anything to have them back😭😔💔💔

    Reply
  73. Sissy-Sissy All Day Posted on August 6, 2019 at 6:56 am

    I cannot imagine what I would do if I lost my brother or my sister. Yes, they can be annoying sometimes but, they really do mean a lot to me and I love them with all my heart. In fact, I love my whole entire family. They make me a better person. I know that I will always love my entire family, and they will always love me.

    Rest In Piece💖

    Reply
  74. laci Ann Sciremammano Posted on August 7, 2019 at 5:22 am

    I am so sorry

    Reply
  75. Dan Posted on August 7, 2019 at 7:14 am

    Depression gets ahold of all of us sooner or later

    Reply
  76. annie editing Posted on August 7, 2019 at 2:28 pm

    0:48 you could hear in her voice she was trying not to cry aww i’m sorry bby it u look up slit wrist it will come up as a suicide prevention. so don’t do it

    Reply
  77. 1985 Toyota Trueno AE86 Sprinter GT Apex Posted on August 7, 2019 at 9:02 pm

    It’s always caused from depression 🙄

    Edit: I really don’t care about this by the way

    Reply
  78. Mini IISuperwomanII Posted on August 8, 2019 at 6:05 am

    May His Soul Rest In Peace😭🙏❤

    Reply
  79. Daphne PARKINSON Posted on August 8, 2019 at 10:25 am

    Oh, sweetheart. I’m literally crying rn. Don’t worry, he will always be part of your heart. He wouldn’t want you to be sad, you seemed to have a great and kind personality and keep being you.

    Reply
  80. Donivan the Gamer Daisha the Pokémon trainer Posted on August 10, 2019 at 12:38 am

    Don’t worry I feel like you I lost my dad and he was my favorite person

    Reply
  81. kavitha ananthi Posted on August 10, 2019 at 1:01 am

    This video makes me remember what happened to my brother😭 he was jus 19 wen god took away his life in an accident😭it's just a year gone without seeing u bro but I'm dying inside every second with your killing memories😭it should have been me😟instead of u that day to travel in that bus😭I was not allowed to see him at last😭

    Reply
  82. Brooke Mendoza Posted on August 10, 2019 at 6:33 am

    i care for people so much that when i herd this story i cried

    Reply
  83. Kissaria Linnen Posted on August 10, 2019 at 9:47 pm

    😭😭😭😫😫😫😭😢

    Reply
  84. ディアスジェレミー Posted on August 11, 2019 at 5:49 am

    So sorry that your brother had to pass away that way, he deserved better, rest in peace.

    Reply
  85. scott montgomery Posted on August 11, 2019 at 8:46 am

    Don't cry because it ended Smile because it happened

    Reply
  86. Carlos Ramirez Posted on August 13, 2019 at 4:14 am

    My step mom died from cancer

    Reply
  87. UnicornRobloxFunLife XD Posted on August 13, 2019 at 5:24 pm

    What Does Having Wrist Slit Mean?? No Offence

    Reply
  88. Chris Thegoat Posted on August 14, 2019 at 2:58 pm

    Watching this video broke my heart

    Reply
  89. Lil Galaxy Posted on August 15, 2019 at 9:48 pm

    U should buy a ouigia board and go to his grave and talk to him

    Reply
  90. Super Tails Matt Posted on August 17, 2019 at 3:07 am

    How did he die

    Reply
  91. natalie fox Posted on August 17, 2019 at 12:02 pm

    You did not go to school FOR 30 YEARS

    Reply
  92. Aeona Navarro Posted on August 17, 2019 at 10:24 pm

    you’re brother is looking at you he will always be in you’re dreams

    Reply
  93. Star Inc. Posted on August 18, 2019 at 6:38 pm

    Killing your self is very coward. When I was that age I tried to all the time. Anyway I could. For some reason I never was successful. God wanted me to live. Now that I’m grown up, I like my life. I have steady income, a car, and a nice home. I also am very beautiful. I think I tired to do it back then because if the way my family treated me. They are still that way to this day. I will never let anybody make me do that

    Reply
  94. Dbxenoboiii 256 Posted on August 21, 2019 at 11:28 am

    I’m sorry for your loss may he be in your ❤️ ♥️ 💜

    Reply
  95. Lan Phương Nguyễn Posted on August 21, 2019 at 2:01 pm

    R.I.P Brother 2001-

    Reply
  96. GFgang-gatcha Posted on August 21, 2019 at 2:44 pm

    You know why he didn’t die? Because he will always be on your side because he is your brother even if he is gone still he’s your brother right?

    Reply
  97. Ayden The Boss Posted on August 23, 2019 at 10:31 pm

    Wish u the best! Seriously. 😭😭😭😭
    Feels sad: I lost Cameron Boyce 😭😭

    Reply
  98. Pink Flamingo Posted on August 23, 2019 at 11:36 pm

    At dinner??????

    Reply
  99. TheRealhero 76 Posted on August 24, 2019 at 12:40 am

    Good because she's American

    Reply
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